Counting Chickens Before They Hatch

Well, I did it.

I pissed off the Kiln Gods.

I was on track to meet my goal of donating 2 dozen bowls for the Empty Bowls Project here in town and I made an offhand joke about the kiln gods either being angels or assholes in response to the fact I was going to have to refire 9 bowls because the glaze pinholed.

And then the load with my bowls in it had a kiln failure.

Not just a kiln failure, but a complete "melt the socket and plug at the wall" failure. This is at the makers space that I am a member of, so it also affected several other people with work destined for other purposes as well as the Empty Bowls event. It figures. But then it is never a given that the kiln gods will cooperate as you plan, so it is what it is. I have a dozen bowls that are made and while I am hoping that I can reach my 2 dozen goal, I will have to be satisfied that I at least got a dozen bowls done. That means that when things actually do turn out, I will have a lot of extra bowls. Everyone in my family is going to get several bowls for Christmas. But that is not a bad thing. I am going to continue to make bowls in the upcoming weeks so that I can keep working towards bigger bowls, which has been a struggle for me. Pulling forms taller than 12" is something I need to work on.

On the "self care" front, I have decided that over the next couple weeks I am going to spend a heck of a lot less time with toxic things such as Facebook, and a lot more time painting, writing and exploring both the outside world and the inside world. I am going to Syracuse in a bit so that I can finally start acting on my desire to travel. An opportunity came up for me to go on a trip with my husband and while I usually stay home to "hold down the fort", this time I decided that the fort can manage itself. I have made excuses that subconsciously have been an attempt at "comfort". I have realized that getting out of my comfort zone is something that does not happen as often as it should. So I am going to Syracuse.

I am also taking along books on writing haiku and poetry. I have always loved haiku but have gotten away from it since my kids were born. I think it is time to get back. I start every morning with writing my three pages of morning pages, so adding a haiku writing time would not be too much trouble. Do you have a writing practice? I always hesitate to say "writing practice" because I feel it puts it at a level that is lofty and precious. Writing practices should be neither. They should be awkward, honest, painful at times and without expectations and rules. But the vulnerability is frightening too. So for many years I have put it aside. At this stage in my life I am trying to connect more with my inside world than my outside world, so writing is as important as any other form of expression.

And so it is. What is expected is not always what is going to happen. That might be the most important thing to remember.